Mirajane's Desires
by MissVanillacide
Summary: In which Macao and Wakaba try to find out Mirajane's deepest and darkest desires. (NO LEMON I seriously can't write on of those.)


**Disclaimer: I don't own fairy tail, only the plot of the story**

Wakaba and Macao were partners in crime. They had been friends ever since they joined fairy tail.

The two men had watched the development between their guild members like Natsu, Cana, Levy, Erza and Mira.

It was no secret that Wakaba and Macao were both perverts, in all honesty every male in the guild was perverts. Mirajane strauss, the eldest of the strauss siblings was normally the target of all the perverted comments.

Mirajane had always had a good figure, she was smart and would make a good house wife, however she happens to be one of the hardest people to read.

Her face always has a smile planted on her face, always happy and hardly ever sad. She may seem friendly but many people take a hard time reading her.

Today Crime Sorciere was over and Erza and Jellal were talking with blushes dusted on their cheeks. Everyone knew that they liked each other, it was a shock for the former oracion seis members aside from cobra, who could obviously hear Jellal's thoughts.

Meredy had noticed the changes and ways Natsu would interact with his partner, Lucy. However the most obvious thing she noticed was the faint blush on each other's cheeks whenever they talked to each other.

Meredy sat next to Juvia who was admiring Gray who also sat on the other side of her. "Ohayo Juvia-chan" Meredy said happily.

However Juvia was lost in her daydream of marrying Gray that she hardly even noticed Meredy.

Meredy giggled and asked Mira for a smoothie.

"Hey Mira, have you realised all the couples in Fairy Tail" Meredy said whilst sipping her smoothie.

Mira dropped a plate.

"Oh Mira, are you okay?" Meredy asked whilst peering over the bar to check Mira.

"Yes, I'm fine." Mira said with a huge smile.

"Anyways have you noticed the different couples that are sparking up quickly? I mean first we have Natsu and Lucy, they're inseparable. Gray and Juvia, Gray's slowly starting to fall for Juvia and Jellal and Erza are just so cute." Meredy said with stars in her eyes.

Mira felt something building up inside of her.

She then slapped her cheeks. 'I quit that years ago' she thought to herself.

"Mira-chan Are you alright?" Meredy said with concern inside of her voice.

"Gomen Meredy-chan, I just happen to have a desire of matchmaking" Mira said whilst sheepishly rubbing the back of her head.

"Ahh, I see" Meredy giggled.

~Meanwhile~

"Macao, did you hear that?" Wakaba whispered discreetly.

"Yes, I did" Macao said with a bloody nose.

"Hey, wakaba." Macao said.

"Yeah?" Wakaba asked.

"Your wife, she specialises in potions right?" Macao said with a small shiver.

"Yes, why do you ask…?" Wakaba trailed off.

"Mira just said the word 'desire', there's a potion about desires right?" Macao said with thoughtful eyes.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you" a maroon haired poison dragon slayer said whilst passing them.

"The things in that she-demons head is freaky" Cobra warned them.

However they took 'freaky' in the wrong way.

Then next thing you know they have blood trailing off from their noses.

"LEVY-CHAN~" They yelled while cobra face palmed. 'They'll learn the hard way' Cobra thought to himself.

Levy turned her head to see two old men with one arm around each other. They had blood trailing their noses whilst having sparkling eyes. Their brows were raised while having one of each of their hands raised in the air.

"Gihi, you have something on your face" Gajeel said.

"Levy~chan, IS THERE A THING CALLED A DESIRE POTION" Macao practically yelled.

"Ermm, yes there is- wait I'm not helping you. Go ask Lu-chan or someone else" Levy said with her arms crossed.

When Macao and Wakaba had walked off towards Lucy, Levy suddenly felt scared. "Wait isn't it Lucy's time of the month?" She thought to herself.

"LUCYY" Wakaba and Macao yelled.

Lucy turned her head to see two old men with one arm around each other. They had blood trailing their noses whilst having sparkling eyes. Their brows were raised while having one of each of their hands raised in the air.

She then looked to them with her scary Lucy face that said 'talk to me and I'll kill you'.

"Lucy I got you chocolate" Natsu said.

Lucy snatched it and gobbled it up.

"Hehe, That's the reason why Lucy's heavy" Happy said with two paws covering his mouth whilst Natsu did the same snickering in the background.

Lucy's vision went red. "SHUT UP YOU STUPID CAT" and she threw Happy on the other side of the room.

Happy bumped into Pantherlily who caught Happy.

"Are you okay Happy?" Lily said concerned.

"Hai" Happy said happily.

Gajeel however walked up to Natsu. "YOUR CAT IS BEING ANNOYING SALAMANDER!" Gajeel yelled.

"WELL HAPPY COULD PROBABLY TAKE ON YOUR CAT, TIN HEAD!" Natsu yelled and butt his head with Gajeel's.

Gray snickered in the background.

They both turned their heads to the source.

"WHAT'S SO FUNNY STRIPPER" Natsu and Gajeel yelled at the same time.

Next thing you know Gray's clothes were off.

"UWAAAA GRAY-SAMA'S SO BOLD" Juvia said with hearts in her eyes.

Gray, Natsu and Gajeel began to fight each other whilst the former Oracion seis member known as Angel had looked at Gray's sculpted figure.

Angel quietly whispered to Meredy who was looking at the fight with wide eyes. "Gray's got a sculpted body, don't you think".

Then Angel turned around to see Juvia glaring at them with a deadly aura. "LOVE-RIVAL" she pointed at angel.

The crime sorciere members had paled drastically.

Gajeel was then shoved towards Elfman who then shouted "FIGHTING IS MANLY" and then he joined the brawl.

The four of them caused chaos wherever they went. Jet and Droy then ran off into the fight.

"LET'S JOIN" Jet yelled.

"YEAH" Droy yelled back.

Then a bright light appeared and loke was out. "LOKEE! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE" whilst he ran off to join the fight with his guildmates.

Cobra, Racer, Angel, Hoteye and Midnight had paled while Jellal and Meredy laughed at their states.

Then a scarlet headed woman went in the middle of the guild. Everyone stopped functioning aside from Natsu, Gray and Gajeel.

"METAL HEAD"

"EXHIBITIONIST"

"FLAME BRAIN"

They then felt shivers.

"Do I hear fighting" She glared at them.

Gajeel, Gray and Natsu hugged. "No, we're best friends" Gray and Gajeel said.

"Aye sir" Natsu said.

Meredy and Jellal were now howling while the rest of crime sorciere had sweatdropped at their action.

Mira laughed at their pathetic state while Macao and Wakaba had come rushing in the guild.

"MIRA MIRA DRINK THIS" Macao and Wakaba yelled.

"Etto- no thank you" she said with a smile on her face.

Cobra's eyes widened. "They didn't" he whispered.

He sniffed the air and the other slayers noticed and did the same.

Their eyes widened at the drink.

Mira sipped it.

"NO MIRAAAAA~" The slayers yelled.

"Yes, Yes, Yes" Macao and Wakaba chanted.

Mira's face went dark and her bangs had come out of her hair tie and shadowed her face.

"Mira-nee? Are you alright?" Lisanna asked.

"Oh no, LISANNA TRIPLE M.M.M IS BACK" Elfman yelled concerned which caused the attention of guild members to turn to them.

"Triple M.M.M" Lisanna gasped dramatically and fell into Bixlow's arms who cradled her quietly.

Macao and Wakaba quivered. "What's triple M.M.M?" They asked subtly while Elfman looked to evergreen. He instinctively wrapped his arms around her.

A squeal erupted from Mira's mouth and her eyes had stars inside.

She looked around and spotted Natsu and Lucy, she then ran up to them and smashed their heads together. They turned bright red but didn't stop with their mouth magic. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

"GET MARRIED" Mira yelled slowly turning into her Satan Soul Alegria.

She then appeared next to Gajeel and dragged him by the collar whilst everyone around her was terrified of this sight.

"Oi She-demon let go of me" Gajeel choked out.

She then forced him on top of Levy. "BABIES NOW" She demanded with sparkles in her eyes.

Cobra decided to try and poison her to make her stop.

"POISON DRAGON ROAR" He yelled while a beam of poison had flushed out of his mouth.

Natsu and Lucy yelled "NOO" whilst the beam had reached Mira.

Soon enough the whole area where Mirajane was, had been covered in poison. That was until it began to swirl in. Mira sucked in the poison and licked her lips.

"Didn't anyone ever tell you never to poison a demon" she asked with a mischievous smile.

BANG

A pan hit Mira from behind. Elfman had stood there while evergreen had clung to his arm.

"That… was…. Not…. manly…." He said between pants.

Levy walked up to the bottle that Mira had drunk from. "The potion should've worn off by now so you shouldn't worry. Besides can you please explain what Triple M.M.M is?" She said pointedly.

Lisanna had woken from her state and said "triple M.M.M is Match Making Mira".

"Matchmaking is one word" Levy said.

"Meh" she replied. "Either way, Mira earned that name in our village before we were kicked out, and because they kicked us out Mira stopped Matchmaking and fell into a state of depression". Lisanna replied.

"Ahhh" Everyone in the guild replied happy that she's not suffering depression anymore.

"Etto- what happened?" Mirajane asked everyone.

"Mira-nee you went Triple M.M.M" Lisanna said.

"Gomen everyone." Mira said dejectedly and returned to the bar. Crime Sorciere started leaving then Jellal hugged Erza and whispered something in her ear that made her face resemble the same colour as her hair.

Mira watched from the bar with a sly grin on her face.

SQUEAL!

**Done bro**

**That took a day and my arm hurts.**


End file.
